Eastfist

10 Things I’ve Learned Turning 37 years old
By Chongchen Saelee

Gaw dayum. I’m turning 37 years old next month. Here are 10 things I’ve learned in my existence:

1. People are in their final Dragon Ball Z form by the time they are around 22 years old in modern days because that’s when they experience the most responsibilities and exposure to harsh reality. Be grateful you live longer these days. I could have peaked at 32 years old with a dead 12 year old wife and dying of consumption and rickets. So look forward to a nice long healthy life in modern times.

2. If you’re single, date people within your age range given 5 years younger or older. Otherwise you won’t be able to relate to them. It’s a waste of time changing yourself for anyone at this age. Besides, unless you are a virgin or relatively inexperienced in dating by my age, these will literally be the best years of sex in your life because you are in peak shape and have proficient sex experience. Partner count doesn’t mean anything if you didn’t learn anything.

3. At the same time, sex isn’t important anymore. When I was young, I was having a lot of sex for validation or clout. (more…)

By Chongchen Saelee

In this follow-up article to my previous one, I want to continue into the specific details and techniques I use to screen out fakes, time-wasters, cops, catfish, etc., when I’m trolling Craigslist and Backpage for dates. (more…)

By Chongchen Saelee

Now, I don’t know if there is a precedent, but my journalistic tendency is beckoning me to find some goober who would be ballsy enough to let me document their attempts at getting laid via Craigslist or Backpage. I bring my camera and film the entire process: hours emailing/texting, line-by-line play, getting groomed, meeting up, doing the deed as proof of concept, and then the aftermath. Confidentiality will be guaranteed. The only catch is that I get to reap the benefits from the documentation. Your identities will be concealed of course. This is probably the only time you’ll get this kind of protection by law, where journalists don’t have to give up their informants, which is what you’d be considered.

And who knows, maybe I can submit the story to Vice or something.

By Chongchen Saelee

NOTE: A transsexual is a person who completely physically changed from one gender to the other. A transvestite is a cross-dresser whose natural gender is intact. When I use the term “tranny” here, for this purpose, I only refer to transsexuals.

Okay, young ladies and gentleman. It might shock you that once you’ve blossomed into a sexually mature adult that you’re going to have to go out there and find a mate and procreate (if you so choose). And depending on what you’re into sexually, you might need to know how to find the proper mate (or sex parner might be more appropriate term) for yourself. Of course, my only experience is that of a straight born-male (or what the trannies call “cis”). But seeing as how I troll Craigslist a lot, I’ve encountered a many kinds of people, who too are looking for love or quick-love, but they are human nonetheless. So I won’t be too rude or crude. Here are my tips about how to spot transsexuals on the Internet: (more…)

By Chongchen Saelee

I couldn’t possible sell you on the fakeness that is Tinder like Slutever can, an app for iPhones and maybe Windows desktops (if you download some shady makeshift software), so I’ll just tell it how it is. Tinder is meant to be a casual dating resource, much like AdultFriendFinder or Fling is suppose to be, but without all the porn and bots. Ironically, Tinder turns out to be no different, it just dresses and presents itself more tamely. (more…)

By Chongchen Saelee

Oh, tonight was a frustrating waste of time. I chatted for nearly 2 hours with “someone”. It was supposedly a real local woman looking for a casual encounter on Craigslist. Usually, I can detect these easily because there are tell-tale signs, but I was inclined to believe this person was a local because she looked local in her pics. Anyway, it didn’t get anywhere. So let me share with you poor saps how to spot a fake post on Craigslist or Backpage anyway. It’s the least I can do. (more…)

The brilliant, affable, polite, and charming Dr. Jinseng Kwak returns! (more…)

And women wonder where the prostitution stigma comes from. (more…)

Yahoo Singles just sent me an e-mail saying that they’re selling out to Match.com. First off, Yahoo did not provide the best service for non-English named gents like myself. I know they’re trying to prevent spam, but do they no know that people out there don’t (more…)